Management-ALLY: Part 1

It is a long time since I contributed to my blog. Well, I shall stick to the eternal management excuse - I have been busy.

Management-ALLY is going to be a monologue of Office, Work, Corporate, and of course Management. There is a lot of things I want to write about management, for it contains all the recipes for a smashing bestseller - Action, Comedy, Sex, and Intrigue.

I wonder what management is all about. It is used in the office premises, business meetings, seminars, colleges, school, and even home is not spared. What is Management? The Webster Dictionary mentions Management as – 1. The act or art of managing things: the conducting or supervising of something (as a business); 2.judicious use of means to accomplish an end.

Peter Drucker, says in his book “Managing in a Time of Great Change” that management (here I mean the modern term of business management) found its genesis around the World War I and came to limelight around the World War II. No other function in history has emerged as fast as management and managers have in the last fifty to sixty years. In fact they are multiplying faster than streptococcus bacteria. Management is an age old practice. In fact the most successful executive would have been that Egyptian who, 4700 years or more ago, first conceived the pyramid – without any precedent – designed it and built it- in a record time. And it still stands.

But I think the genesis of management goes far beyond this. Yes it was much before the coming of great civilization. It was thousands of years ago when Neanderthal man roamed the earth, well not the whole earth, but a part of it.

Mr. Neanderthal was a Lone ranger. He never believed in sharing or delegating his work. His daily chore was – hungry - eat; thirsty – drink, tired – sleep, horny – sex. In today management world, his requirements were at the bottom of Maslow’s hierarchy.

Soon he realized that sex was hard to come by and decided that he move in with Mrs. Neanderthal. Yeah, right archeology proves that women used to stay in caves while men wandered about.

Then soon they realized being in group reduced their chance of going hungry, and increased the chance of extra-marital affair… and hence they invited some more to join them in the group. They had a focus/ mission of coming together – they could now hunt together and also they derived their strength in numbers, which gave them security from bigger predators…

The first manager would have been the caveman who said “urghh htydk glrk blpj”(Meaning: you are late for the meeting. What is the latest update?) and then started the culture of management. The hallmarks of an ideal management are: Satisfied Manager, and disgruntled employees working under him.

Soon the group started increasing in numbers (because the lifespan of the cavemen increased, because of the group), and that led to delegation of work. But the ultimate power for the group leader Caveman came with the power of ‘Fire’.

The discovery of fire - it would have been discovered when a bolt of lighting would have struck and created a forest fire… our ancestors would have burnt their hands trying to catch a burning wood at the wrong end… but they would have also liked the taste of the animals that was burnt in the fire… thus they would have realized that food would taste good if it was ‘fired’... but then getting the fire was a problem… and controlling it was more difficult. The caveman used to wait for the next lighting bolt at the place where it struck before… but then it never happened… and thus came the realization – lighting never strikes at the same place twice

Well, coming back to the manager and fire connection… it was the man who learnt the art of controlling the fire… that became the manager. He got to sit close to it, when the climate was cold, he got to roast the food and have the first bite when it came to eat, and poke the fire at someone who tried to act to smart… thus he got the ability to ‘fire’ anyone… and that was the main quality and still is the main differential point between the manager and the people who work under him…THE ABILITY TO FIRE ANYONE.

Some things have not changed through the ages. Amen.


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